Leviticus 20:6-21:6

This passage is all about how Jews, as God's chosen people, should be holy, should be different than the other peoples.  The same is true of us as Christians.  We're no longer required to offer sacrifices in the temple or refrain from eating pork, but we are required to keep ourselves holy (with God's help, of course!), to view our bodies and our lives as temples to God, to behave differently than others--with love, with purity, with righteousness.  I'm not advocating being purposefully, intentionally different, necessarily, I mean simply that the way we live our lives, as Christians, is ultimately different than how a 'normal' person would live his or her life.  Of course we will not succeed by ourselves and need God's help every step of the way, but that's no reason not to strive.

Fasting

Today, completely spontaneously, I fasted.  It was my first time, and it was really really interesting.  I was surprised at how not hungry I was most of the day--I mostly just got hungry around meal times.  Not eating definitely made me realize how much food there is, all over--restaurants, street vendors, grocery stores.  I thought a lot about people who can't eat the food that's all around, not because they have chosen to abstain, but because they don't have the money to.  Lord, please be with those people, and please help us to be generous with those who need help.

Kindness

Little acts of kindness really can make a difference.  Today I was feeling lonely and a bit separate, and one person's extremely small kindness made me feel so much better and loved.  I want to be that kind of person--the one who is kind to everyone through small gestures that are all the more poignant for being small.  Never think that small things don't make a difference, that you can't make a difference.  Just because something is small doesn't mean that it won't mean a lot to someone.  Or many small things could add up over time.  Or God may use your small act to change something huge.  Never think that you can't make a difference.

Job 10

Here Job refuses to be silent.  He pours out his soul to You--his confusion (have I done something wrong so that I deserve this suffering?  Why is this happening to me?), bitterness, anger, and despair.  But he also believes in You--he is clearly speaking to You here, and speaks of Your creation, Your love and comfort and grace.  Despite his suffering, despite his doubts, Job still believes in You and refuses to curse You.  Please give me the strength to believe in You no matter what else is going on in my life, and please give me the courage to be honest about my feelings with You, but also to overcome those feelings.

Pristimantis Rain Frog (Pristimantis aracamuni)

Today I am praying for the Pristimantis Rain Frog (Pristimantis aracamuni), an endangered frog species from South America.  Not much is known about it, like so many species.

Photo from http://eol.org/data_objects/12581752; ⓒ Justin Touchon
This is a picture of a related frog species, the Limon Rubber Frog (Pristimantis cerasinus)

I see nature as a vital part of God's creation.  The intricacy of nature just blows my mind away; no one but You could have ever created something so perfect.  If we respect other people because they are God's creation, why can't we do the same of His other creations, his non-human creations?  Destroying nature is just another thing we all have to ask forgiveness for.

Joshua 12

A list of lands and kings that the Israelites defeated.  Do You keep a list of all the sins/problems that You and I have defeated together?  I was going to add 'mostly You,' and maybe that's true, but if anything is going to change I have to made a decision to change.  You can only help me if I agree, if I'm willing.  That's what we get from free will.  And I have to keep making that decision, again and again and again.   You can help with that, of course, but ultimately You let me make the decision.  That is just so crazy!  You give us so much responsibility (freedom?), which we don't deserve and couldn't deal with without You.  But it's also a huge part of Your plan, of how You work.  You wanted to give us the choice; You didn't want people who just blindly worship You because they don't have a choice.  We have to choose to follow You, choose to worship You, choose to trust You, choose to accept Your love and help and guidance and everything else You can give.

Temptation

I was struggling with temptation, but when I repeated Hebrews 2:18 ("For because he has suffered and been tempted, he is able to help those who are tempted"), the temptation suddenly became much less tempting.  Thank You.

Hebrews 2

Hold the gospel close, or else you'll forget it.  People are sinful--if our own salvation depended on us not sinning, we'd never get anywhere near.  I couldn't agree more.  In verses 6-8, is 'him' humans or Jesus?  I God?  "Crowned with glory and honor because of the suffering of death"--that's a very Christian idea.  Many people might say that doesn't make sense, that death is final and that we're dead, no matter why you died.  But we as Christians have heaven.  Thank You, Lord, Jesus destroyed the devil ("him who has the power of death") "through death"--using the devil's own weapons against him, without sinking to his level.  It's amazing that You thought of that solution, and amazing that You went through with it, that You actually sent Your son, Your only son, to suffer and die.  I forget about that part of Christianity sometimes. What an ugly way to die.  But You went through with it for us, for me.  For every single person on this earth.  That's so mind-blowing.  And despite all Your suffering, all the suffering You see and feel and know every day, You are still good.  Thank YOu.  Verse 18 is extremely comforting: "For because he has suffered and been tempted, he is able to help those who are tempted."  Please help me to remember that when I feel overwhelmed by sin, Lord--that, and that You are powerful.

The Hills

Walking down the street, I caught a sudden glimpse of the hills in the sunlight, and their beauty reminded me of You.

Mark 1

This chapter is full of faith--John the Baptist's, Jesus', Simeon and Andrew, James and John, the people who came to Jesus to ask for healing.  I can't imagine the faith it would take to leave everything just because some guy asked you to.  I know You're more than just a guy, but how did they know that--they'd never seen you before.  What was so compelling about You that they just left their lives to follow You?  Especially James and John, who left their father behind in the boat when they left.  I don't know if I could do that.  Please give me such faith.  And Your power.  You cast out demons without allowing them to say Your name or who You are, You heal the sick, You call people to You and they come (how many did You call that didn't come?).  Are some things today caused by demons, and we just don't realize it because we're so science- and reality-focused?  You teach and heal--connected?  Your teachings help heal the soul?  And even though all those people wanted to see You, You took time to go be alone and to pray.  Please help me to do that, too.

Walking in the rain

Walking in the rain, I suddenly felt Your love so strongly that I wanted to cry.

Thoughts

No Bible this morning.  Instead I've been thinking, mostly about conversations I've had with someone recently.  Haven't agreed with him much, but was never sure why.  Going to try and hash it all out here.

"There is no Satan; everyone is partly good and partly evil, saying that anyone is purely good or purely evil is extreme."
Don't know if I believe in Satan--although the Bible's perfectly clear on it, so I probably should.  Also, interestingly, he's seen as a presence in Haiti--but I do believe in pure evil.  And it makes sense that if You're the manifestation of pure good, then there must be a manifestation of pure evil, as well.  Sense of balance.  Is true that no one is purely good or evil, but I'm also inclined to think that most people tend one way or the other.  Maybe that's just from seeing too many movies and books, though.  Do think it's bad that 'evil' has connotations of evil, only used when something's really bad, but 'good' is used in so many different ways in everyday life, and doesn't have as much of a connotation of being used when something's really good.  Please help me to use 'good' only when I really mean it.

"We have to always do good, enjoyable things."
That's not exactly what he said, but... anyway, I disagree.  Happiness doesn't depend on only having good things happen to you.  It may help, but it ultimately depends on you.  And You.

"Freedom is a good thing.  I think everyone should be free to do what they want--but not anything that would harm anyone."
Disagree.  I think our deepest nature is good, in the purest sense of the word, but evil is so much easier that if we were given complete freedom, with no guide-lines at all, our natural tendency would be to do what's easy, what's evil.  And the classification, "but not anything that would harm anyone" can't really be said, party because it restricts 'freedom' and so isn't really valid, and partly because--what's harm?  Physical harm?  Emotional harm?  How much emotional and physical harm?  When someone has complete freedom other than that, I think it would be easy to chip away and chip away at your only restrain until it wasn't there at all.  And I believe that You give me freedom, by giving me rules.  I know, that didn't make any sense.  But it sort of does.  The rules help us avoid evil and sin, both of which enslave us to our own impulses and to evil.

Genesis 31

I feel like both Jacob and Laban were a bit in the wrong here.  Laban may have cheated Jacob over Rachel and Leah, but Jacob cheated Laban with the spotted goats and sheep.  He whines about everything to Rachel and Leah for a bit.  Why are You on Jacob's side, encourage him in that dream?  Is it because of Abraham?  Or did something not get told, something that would make me understand why You supported Jacob?  Then Rachel and Leah answer, here they seem really bitter about their father.  Jacob runs away like a coward.  I must admit, that's probably how I would handle such a situation. If Laban's not supposed to say a word to Jacob, then why do they start talking?  Both of them seem really bitter about how their relationship turned out.  That's what you get when you're always betraying and fighting for power.  Definitely doesn't make you friends.  Really superstitious about the household gods, stole them. Didn't trust You.  But how much did Jacob tell Rachel and Leah about You?  Not sure they mention You that much.  Laban and Jacob's covenant seem like an a really uneasy 'good-riddance!' covenant.

Genesis 30

Wow, what a lot of pettiness.  Especially, "Give me children or I shall die!", what a drama queen.  But also shows how much a woman's identity/self-worth was wrapped up in bearing children, this whole part of the chapter does.  Again with the maidservants!  I really wonder how they felt about all this--I think it would be horrible to have your children taken away to be raised by someone else, but still have to see them every day.  Then the incident with the mandrakes.  That, I think, shows the relationship between Rachel and Leah very clearly.  Love how Leah says "You must come in to me; for I have hired you with my son's mandrakes."  Why would you tell him that?  I feel like she was trying to rub in her victory, but I also think it was mostly just awkward.  Have I mentioned before that Jacob can't have disliked Leah that much since they had 6 sons and must have been having a lot of sex?  Then the story with Jacob and the speckled sheep and goats.  I always used to really like the story, but now I think it was just horrible from Jacob, just more deception on his part.  Especially when he chooses to try and make only the good sheep have speckled babies.